From Esquire, by Jack Holmes:
“It’s here where we must stop and point out that the president just referred to his own son as, “she’s got a son—together.” Fatherhood! There’s also the stream-of-consciousness diatribe about The Trade Wars With Everyone, which somehow proves Trump loves American companies, even these specific American companies, even if he is going to ban their most lucrative products. But Trump makes it abundantly clear here that Melania got him onto this. Is she just reading news reports? Did they catch one of Barron’s friends Juuling in the Lincoln Bedroom? Whatever the reason, the Executive Branch is now against vaping. The government has identified a dangerous device and sought to remove it from the market.
And it’s here where we’ll insert the obligatory note that other devices which are far more definitively linked to death and injury are not up for any kind of ban. After all, the kids are in danger when they go to school and their peers offer them a Juul hit in the bathroom, but they’re also in danger when their peers show up with semiautomatic rifles and shoot them. Yet while e-cigarettes constitute something people choose to put in their own body—that is, not an express violation of other citizens’ rights—they’re up for a ban. Insanely powerful weapons of war, which are regularly used to infringe on the rights of other citizens, must be freely available to all in perpetuity.”
Mango Juuls don’t kill people, people smoking Mango Juuls kill people. Which is why we’re banning Mango Juuls.