Note To Self: Say “I Hear You.” Fake Empathy Will Con Them Every Time.

Trump’s crib sheet from his “listening” session with the parents and survivors of gun massacres in this country.  How could he NOT remember to say that?

And what is up with the “45” on his cuff?

Can’t he remember what number president he is either?


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Ten Pages vs. Four Pages Is Outrageously Long

Trump, rationalizing why he is blocking the Democratic response to the Nunes memo:

“The Democrats sent a very political and long response memo which they knew, because of sources and methods (and more), would have to be heavily redacted, whereupon they would blame the White House for lack of transparency,” the president wrote on Twitter. “Told them to re-do and send back in proper form!”

Yeah. He wants it in a form he can “read.”

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“Here you go, Daddy. The new Democrat memo. Try to pay attention, O.K.?”


Hey, Mr. “Excellent Health,” How’s That New Diet Working For You?

From Politico:

Though the House was able to pass a four-week spending bill with money for children’s health care on Thursday night, the Senate, with its supermajority voting requirement, doomed the bill and Congress careened past the midnight deadline. Negotiations during the final hours came in fits and starts, with a few bursts of enthusiasm but mostly resignation: Schumer and Trump chatted over cheeseburgers, and a bipartisan group held a last-ditch session Friday night.


Dr. Jackson said he is planning to increase Trump’s medication and put him on a diet and exercise regimen, though he maintained that Trump’s coronary health is superb.

“He has incredible cardiac fitness at this point in his life,” Jackson said.


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The Trump I.Q. test

From The New Yorker, by Broti Gupta and Rebecca Caplan

Welcome to the trump™ I.Q. Test. It’s the hardest test in the entire world, and Barack Obama couldn’t take it ’cuz he was too scared, and because you have to be American to take it. Please answer the questions below to the best of your ability or Lady ability.

1. Which of these five is unlike the other four?
(a) Nazis
(b) White supremacists
(c) Very bad people
(d) Very good people
(e) Misunderstood Nazis

Answer: (c)

2. Unscramble this word: maga
(a) gama
(b) maga
(c) aagm
(d) gaam

Answer: (b). The a’s were switched.

3. If Ivanka is 35 and Melania is 47, what is the oldest that a woman can be?
(a) 40
(b) 48
(c) 35
(d) 50

Answer: Would accept (b) or (d); there is no way to know yet.

4. Police brutality is to very good behavior as kneeling is to:
(a) Very good behavior
(b) Pretty bad behavior
(c) Really great behavior
(d) Spitting on a veteran’s widow

Answer: (d)

5. Complete the lyric: “This land is my land _________”
(a) “this land is your land.”
(b) “the monkey chased the weasel.”
(c) [A full 3 Doors Down song]
(d) “.”

Answer: (d)

6. Obama golfing is to taxpayer fraud as Trump golfing is to:
(a) Good for taxpayers
(b) Good at golf
(c) Donald Trump owns many golfs!
(d) All of the above

Answer: (d)

7. Donald lost the popular vote by 3 million ballots. Hillary won the popular vote by 3 million ballots. How many votes did Donald win by if you don’t count those people who voted illegally?
(a) 1 bazillion
(b) 69 million
(c) Wisconsin is technically the most populous state.
(d) Mexico shouldn’t be allowed to vote.

Answer: Will accept (b), (c), or (d), but “bazillion” is not a number.

8. John McCain is to dumb captured idiot as Donald Trump is to:
(a) Lazy (no)
(b) Dumb (no)
(c) Never captured!
(d) THE FLAG!!!!!!

Answer: Donald Trump owns a lot of casinos.

9. One of the following sentences means approximately the same thing as “I have tremendous respect for women and the many roles they serve that are vital to the fabric of our society and our economy.” Choose the one:
(a) “And when you’re a star, they let you do it. You can do anything. Grab them by the pussy.”
(b) “A person who is very flat-chested is very hard to be a ten.”
(c) “You could see there was blood coming out of her eyes, blood coming out of her wherever.”
(d) “If Ivanka weren’t my daughter, perhaps I’d be dating her.”
(e) All of the above

Answer: The locker room!

10. Nine years ago, a Kenyan illegal was elected President. One year ago, a very smart white (technically speaking) man was elected President. Who will be elected President in three years?
(a) A white man
(b) A white woman
(c) A black woman
(d) Ha, “elections”

Answer: (d), but (b) and (c) were very funny jokes.

11. Which of the following does not belong?
(a) 1
(b) 5
(c) 9
(d) Brown people

Answer: (d) ♦


That Was Then. This Is Now.

From The Hill:

Many presidents played golf, especially while on vacation. But Trump’s aides rarely say whether the president is playing golf when he visits his courses.

During his 2016 campaign, Trump promised he would largely give up the game if he were elected president.

“I’m going to be working for you. I’m not going to have time to go play golf. Believe me,” Trump said during an August 2016 rally in Virginia.

Tuesday marks Trump’s 85th visit to one of his golf properties as president, according to a tally kept by NBC News.

The president arrived at the Trump International Golf Club just after 9 a.m. on Tuesday.

He is playing golf with Georgia Sen. David Perdue (R), PGA tour player Bryson DeChambeau and former pro golfer Dana Quigley, according to the White House.


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Dim-wit in Chief

President Donald Trump accidentally referred to the Virgin Islands’ governor as their President during a speech Friday — even though he is technically their President.

“I will tell you I left Texas and I left Florida and and I left Louisiana and I went to Puerto Rico and I met with the President of the Virgin Islands,” he told the audience of the Values Voter Summit in Washington.
“We are one nation and we all hurt together, we hope together and we heal together,” he said, later adding, “The Virgin Islands and the President of the Virgin Islands, these are people that are incredible people, they suffered gravely and we’re be there, we’re going to be there, we have really, it is not even a question of a choice.”
Trump appeared to be referring to Virgin Islands Gov. Kenneth Mapp, instead of the “President” who is Trump himself. The Virgin Islands is a US territory.
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Ya Think?

From Politico:

But it wasn’t until Monday — some 48 hours after the deadly events — that Trump made a bid to assume the role of “empathizer-in-chief,” reading out publicly the names of those who had died while directly condemning the Ku Klux Klan, neo-Nazis and white supremacists.

Trump’s initial wavering was seen by critics as a political nod to a base of supporters who helped lift the Republican last November to the White House. It also reflected something seen throughout Trump’s presidency: His natural instinct has been to respond with force to terrible events, saving the compassion for his surrogates or private interactions.

“He’s missing an empathy gene. It’s just not natural to him,” said former George W. Bush White House speechwriter Peter Wehner. “When people who don’t have empathy try to fake it, it doesn’t come across very well.”

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