9

If “Pizzagate” Wasn’t Weird Enough For You…

…we now have child sex-slaves on Mars.

From The Washington Post:

The situation for human beings on Mars is dire, and not just because the red planet’s atmosphere is mostly carbon dioxide and the average temperature is -81 degrees.

There’s also the issue of the child-trafficking ring operating in secret on the planet 33.9 million miles from earth, according to a guest on the Alex Jones Show.

“We actually believe that there is a colony on Mars that is populated by children who were kidnapped and sent into space on a 20-year ride,” Robert David Steele said Thursday during a winding, conspiratorial dialogue with Jones about child victims of sex crimes. “So that once they get to Mars they have no alternative but to be slaves on the Mars colony.”

NASA did not immediately respond to requests for comment.

But Guy Webster, a spokesman for Mars exploration at NASA, told the Daily Beast that rumors about live humans on Mars are false.

“There are no humans on Mars,” he said. “There are active rovers on Mars. There was a rumor going around last week that there weren’t. There are, but there are no humans.”

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4

It Was Called Segregation, Honey. Choice Had Nothing to Do With It.

President Donald Trump’s efforts to bolster relations with historically black colleges erupted in controversy Tuesday after Education Secretary Betsy DeVos released a statement equating the history of the schools — founded during an era of racial segregation — to “school choice” policies.

“HBCUs are real pioneers when it comes to school choice,” DeVos said in the statement, released Monday night in advance of Trump’s planned signing of an executive order giving the schools more clout. “They are living proof that when more options are provided to students, they are afforded greater access and greater quality. Their success has shown that more options help students flourish.”

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1

Bored of Education

From Politico:

In quoting civil rights activist W.E.B. Du Bois, the Department of Education on Sunday sent out a tweet misspelling his name. And then it sent out an apology that misspelled the word “apologies.”

“Education must not simply teach work – it must teach life. – W.E.B. DeBois,” the Department of Education tweeted at 8:45 a.m.

The Twitter account rewrote the tweet over three hours later, correcting the spelling of Du Bois’ name, followed by a tweet saying: “Post updated – our deepest apologies for the earlier typo.”

That tweet also had a spelling error, with it first saying “apologizes” rather than “apologies.”

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6

Idle Hands Are The Trumps’ Playground

So. I’ve been trying these past few weeks to wrap my head around the outcome of the presidential election. I haven’t been very successful at it. I take a lot of deep breaths and tell myself to calm down, it can’t possibly be as bad as I imagine it will be.

But as it turns out—it already is.

Der Führer went on a “victory tour” yesterday and exulted in his crushing defeat of his foe (nevermind those 3 million more votes she got, which weren’t illegally gained, by the way.) He railed against the “dishonest” media, yet again, and continued his call for flag burning to be cause for loss of one’s citizenship, despite the fact that that has been proven to be un-Constitutional.

Hey, no biggie. Or bigly. Der Führer is calling the shots and when he says throw out the Constitution, we will respond by saying “How far?”

Anyhoo. I am tired of waking up in a cold sweat at 3:00 in the morning. During menopause I used to wake up in a hot sweat. I’ll take that over this any day.

So I’ve been pushing myself to get crafty (not Trump crafty, but actual craft-making crafty) and make some Christmas decorations. Since my maternal great-grandparents were from Norway, I used to have several of those red and white paper woven heart baskets that I had made when my son was a baby—50 years ago now.

But, cue the violins, all of my Christmas decorations were stolen from a storage unit a couple of years ago by a Grinch-like thief, so I decided to make some more.

This time out of felt.

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Then, figuring I’m on a roll (and hoping my fingers will last a little longer before going numb from the exertion), I found some designs on the interwebs for a Dala horse and a bird. These two are pretty small, around two to three inches in length, but my artificial Christmas tree is pretty small too, so they should work just fine.

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Then, my daughter saw them and requested a little larger Dala horse in slightly retro colors to go with her decor.

Et voilà!

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And lastly, in an “idle hands are the Trumps’ playground” fervor, I souped up a standard gingerbread house my grandkids sold to raise money for their school. It came pre-assembled with a kind of puny pack of candy and a bag of white royal icing.

I, however, had biglier plans.

I went to Walmart and bought a couple packages of pre-made cake decorations in the shape of Christmas lights and also a bag of red cookie icing. Then, being on a felt “bender,” I made a 3-D Snoopy.

The decorating process was somewhat excruciating—the royal icing was too watery at first and then too dry and kept oozing out of the zip-lock bag they provided. I always say “Next year I make my own!” and this time I mean it. If Alton Brown can do it, so can I.

The results were pretty satisfying, even though I was a wreck by the time I finished.

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So, that’s what I’ve been doing to try to retain my sanity. How about you?

How are you coping in the post-Trumpian Apocalypse?

3

Join the Club, Kids. The Line Forms on the Right.

From The Hill:

The USA Freedom Kids who became a viral sensation after performing at a Trump rally in January are suing the Republican’s campaign for $15,000 in damages.

The lawsuit claims that the Trump campaign refused to reimburse the travel expenses for the girls in the singing troupe who performed their song, “Freedom’s Call,” at a rally in Pensacola, Fla. The singing group was also not able to sell their merchandise at the event despite getting approval to do so, according to legal documents reviewed by The Daily Beast.

“We are not able to pay the girls or cover travel,” Stephanie Scruggs, a regional field director for Trump’s campaign, wrote to founder of USA Freedom Kids Jeff Popick in January, according to the lawsuit.

“However we have coordinated with the event space to allow the girls to set up a table and pre-sell their album, shirts, etc if this is helpful to you.”

Popick agreed to fund the trip through merchandise sales, but says the group was never allowed to bring the merchandise into the rally. That merchandise was ultimately left outside and stolen, according to the lawsuit.

Trump’s campaign also promised that the girls could perform several songs at another rally in Iowa, but declined to reimburse their travel expenses.

“They had said, well Iowa’s a pretty long distance for us to travel,” the lawyer representing the Freedom Kids, Marc Shapiro, said according to the report.

“There’s plane flights up there, and hotels and so forth, would you give us a stipend so that we can travel up there and perform. The Trump campaign said no, you would have to pay your own way.”

Several hours before the scheduled performance in Iowa, the Trump campaign said the girls were no longer needed at the rally.

“This is not an opportunistic thing where we’re suing Donald Trump,” said Popick, who is the father of one of the girls in the group.

“We’re not suing for emotional distress and all that other stuff that people do when the trump up — no pun intended — when they trump up a lawsuit. That’s not what this is. This is tangible dollars I spent under false pretenses.”

Popick previously said the Trump campaign had promised to pay $2,500 for the Pensacola performance, but acknowledged that the agreement was mostly verbal.

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“His lies are THIS big!”