3

People of WalMart Form PAC for Christie: “He’s Just Like Us!”

This just in—The People of WalMart have formed a political action committee for Gov. Chris Christie to urge him to run for the presidency of the United States.  The new fundraising committee has taken the name FATPAC for Christie.

Well-placed sources tell me that members of the new PAC are excited because, not since William Howard Taft, have we had a president who (in their words) “so closely represents the citizenry of this country.”

“Finally,” says Elrod C. Pflugpucker, FATPAC’s official spokesman, “we’ll have someone in the White House again who understands the average American’s basic needs and wants:  a scooter in every house and the federal defunding of Weight Watchers, Jenny Craig and NutriSystem.”

Mr. Pflugpucker went on to say that Mitt Romney was wrong when he said he would bring back to the White House the bust of Winston Churchill.

“Chris Christie will bring back President Taft’s bathtub.”