From Politico written by Matt Lattimer:
Target: Your brother-in-law, the loyal Jeb! donor
Arrival: Emerge from a black stretch limousine with gold trim, undercarriage lights, license plate reading: NUMBER 1.
Cocktail hour: Bring your own wine, from your private vineyard—the greatest vineyard in the world. It puts Napa to shame, OK? Offer some to your Bush-loving brother-in-law, who is a teetotaler, and also the host. When he says no, pour the wine into his glass anyway. Say: “Maybe this’ll give you some energy.” Refer to him constantly by an emasculating nickname (Mr. Snooze, Four Percent, Hot Pants). Get the kids onboard with this early.
Dinner: Your over-the-top opinion is required on everything. The cranberry sauce is not good; it’s “fantastic.” The stuffing isn’t just bad; it’s “a total disaster.” Spice up your anecdotes with absurd claims. The White House was named after Betty White. You were the inspiration for the Terminator. If nobody takes the bait, quickly ratchet them up: Many leading rabbis have privately told you that Moses was a “really big Christian.” When anyone objects, deny you just said that, then repeat it as fact as soon as your brother-in-law tries to speak again.
After dinner: Turn the largest available TV to the football game and spend all your time alternately praising Tom Brady (who is not playing) and blasting every other player as a “no-talent loser.” Elbow the kids away from the Monopoly table to show them “how the game is really played.” Start with the Teamsters (you) skimming 10 percent of all rent on the hotels or else “there’s going to be some really ugly accidents.” Hand the 13-year-old banker a $50 under the table. When he notices it’s real, tell him, “There’s more where that came from, OK?” Regardless of actual results, declare victory.
From the Richmond Times Dispatch:
Americans like to think of themselves as brave and strong. But a good portion of them are acting very weak and frightened. […] Never to be outdone in the lunacy Olympics, Donald Trump is leaving open the possibility of forcing Muslims — including not just refugees but U.S. citizens — to register with the government as such, and perhaps even carry special ID. (No word on whether that might be a yellow star or crescent.) Instead of taking those suggestions, perhaps America should — oh, maybe stop the bed-wetting, for example. Then pull up its big-boy pants — and get a grip.
This is Ebola all over again, y’all.
My daughter really loves Vincent Van Gogh’s art, as do I. Recently she asked me if I would paint three acrylic copies of his work for her birthday. She gave me a book of some of his paintings and marked the pages of the ones she particularly liked. This is one of them. Only two more to go. Oy.
I’m reminded of the episode of “The Addams Family” where they think Morticia is getting art lessons from Picasso.
Turns out it was Sam Picasso.
That’s me, Sam Van Gogh.
I’ll be having Thanksgiving at my daughter’s, so the only turkey gracing my dining room table is this one.
It’s actually a hat I got at Walmart that I stretched over a ball belonging to my granddaughter. When you wear it as a hat, the legs hang down on either side of your face. Not as ridiculous as Donald Trump’s combover, but close.
When I posted my annual “Michele Bachmann Halloween Cartoon” I thought that it was essentially a blast from the past. But it seems batshit crazy goes on forever.
Here is a quote from the queen of batshit crazy in a radio interview with fellow batshit crazy Tony Perkins with whom she went on a tour of Israel.
She’s talking about converting as many Jews as possible because, apparently, The End Times are upon us.
“We recognize the shortness of the hour,” Bachmann says. “And that’s why we as a remnant want to be faithful in these days and do what it is that the Holy Spirit is speaking to each one of us, to be faithful in the Kingdom and to help bring in as many as we can — even among the Jews — share Jesus Christ with everyone that we possibly can because, again, he’s coming soon.”
Bachmann also says that “the prophets longed to see the days that you and I live in.”
Her takeaway from the trip, she says, is “that the Jewish state of Israel truly is a miracle of the hand of God.”
My annual Halloween cartoon—now in its 6th iteration.
Can it BE that long since Michele Bachmann first darkened our doorsteps?
My, how time flies.