4

Them’s Fightin’ Words, Boy.

“Frankly, if Hillary Clinton were a man, I don’t think she’d get 5 percent of the vote,” Trump told a crowd gathered at Trump Tower in New York for his victory speech after the billionaire swept all five of Tuesday’s East Coast primaries.

“The only thing she’s got going is the woman’s card,” Trump added, in an extended attack on Clinton toward the end of his speech.

“And the beautiful thing is that woman don’t like her… And look at how well I did with women tonight.”

The “woman card.”

Bring it on, you short-fingered vulgarian.

0

Those “Ridiculous” Ethnic Names Are Just So Tricky

Donald Trump on John Kasich’s name:

“I don’t know how to pronounce his name — Kasich. It’s -i-c-h,” Trump said. “Every time I see it I say Kas-itch. But it’s pronounced Kas-ick.

“Can we ask him to change the spelling of his name? Are we allowed to do that? It’s so ridiculous,” Trump added, before moving on.

Thank you, Donald Drumpf, for clearing that up for us.

3

Ooh, Ooh! Pick Me, Pick Me!

From The Hill:

Former GOP presidential contender Rick Santorum says the race for his party’s nomination is “very wide open.”

“There’s still many races to go. It depends on how it all plays out,” Santorum, a former Pennsylvania senator, told reporters at the Capitol on Thrursday.

“If Donald Trump continues to do well and sort of stays on the path that he’s on, I think he’ll be the nominee,” he continued. “If he doesn’t, then things are gonna get complicated.”

Santorum also suggested that delegates could tap a nominee who isn’t currently in the race.

Santorum, who served in Congress from 1995-2007, said he was at the Capitol because he was “just trying to help a friend out with an issue … a little good Samaritan work.”

Isn’t he adorable? He still thinks he has a chance. Bless his heart.

5

Yes. Let’s Go Back to the “Good Old Days.”

From a Trump rally in Janesville, Wisconsin:

As Trump spoke, some listened. Peggy Sue Metz, 47, a trucking dispatcher from Rockton, Illinois, lamented not making it inside and being forced to share the sidewalk with the protesters, who she suspected, were raised with the values of unionized schoolteachers rather than those of their own parents. “It would be nice go back to the days when the father worked and could support five kids and the mother could stay home and raise the kids properly,” she said.

In other words, Donald Trump will make sure women stay pregnant and in the kitchen if he’s elected.

 

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